Discussion #1: Words of Encouragement for Counselors
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This will take just a few minutes:
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\n- Go to: http://www.acacamps.org/staff/counselor/cm/015words.php and read this (short) article. This is a great article for new and returning counselors. It reminds us of the basics that good relationships are built out on, but also the things that we can forget when we’re in the middle of camp.
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\n- Pick one of these suggestions and say a few words as to why it jumped out to you. For instance, perhaps the one that talks about “looking for the positive in each camper and emphasizing it in front of others” reminds you of a time when someone did that to you and you felt confident afterward.
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\n- Check back and read others comments, too! -
Okay so what stuck out to me was being consistent! I remember when I was younger how frustrating it was when people in authority were inconsistent, as in one day it’s okay to do something but the next day you get in trouble for it. It’s super important for the rules that are the rules to always be the rules
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The thing that I really liked was: take an active interest in the interests of your campers. You will learn a lot from them. Its so true! You never will get to know your campers unless you just sit down with them and listen. Some of my favorite times with campers were just during free swim when we would all sit around and play cards. You get to learn about their lives and see where they are coming from. This definitely helped my patience with them, when I realized why they are the way they are. I promise that the more of yourself that you put into this, the more you will get out of it!
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The tip that I felt the strongest reaction to was: Teach manners by saying “please” and “thank you.”
\nOddly enough, some of my strongest camp memories are of lessons in manners from counselors I’ve had over the years. While my parents taught me “yes sir/no sir” and “yes ma’am/no ma’am” it was at camp where I learned to pass to the right around the table, keep passing the food even though you may not want any of something yourself, and don’t ever slide the pitcher across the table!! Not only is that rude, but there are pretty messy consequences too…
\nEspecially since I’ve always had younger campers, I have made it a priority to set expectations for good (& mess free) table manners. I think that introducing those good habits at a time when they’re still learning a lot about manners at home and in school increases the chance that the habits will stick. I know it stuck with me! -
The one that really stuck out to me was Be Fair. I always remember getting in trouble for something that I did but only because someone else did something to me first. Usually if a child does something there might be a less obvious underlying reason as to why they did it. I think it is important to get both sides of a story and make sure the real problem is solved.
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“Take an active interest in the interests of your campers. You will learn a lot from them.”
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\nEven as a young adult, there are few greater feelings than when someone (particularly an older, “cooler” person) wants to learn more about me and my interests. When I was a child, this feeling was even stronger, so I can imagine that campers absolutely adore it when their counselors are eager to discover their interests and personalities. It’s a completely valid statement that you will learn a lot from discussing interests with other people, and in a camp setting I believe that this will be illustrated even more. -
Be a role model. Lead by example.
\nI really liked this one because I remember when I was a camper I looked up to a lot of my counselors. A lot of my counselors were role models for me and the person that I wanted to become. Now as a counselor I would want campers to think the same. Also, the part about lead by example is important because you always want to do the right thing. -
The thing that struck me was: Take an active interest in the interests of your campers. You will learn a lot from them. If you are interested in the kids, they will a. learn from you and do the same and b. respect you and trust you more. When you are a good listene others ofter feel at home talking with you and learning from you as well. Some of my favorite things are when the kids know a lot about a single subject. They get into their own hobbies and can tell you so much, probably more than you know about the subject too so it’s great for me to learn new things. The great things is that this comes full circle. Be interested, they will respond well to you…and YOU will learn more from them than you ever thought you would.
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Watch your language. Don’t use profanity.
\nWhat stuck out to me about this suggestion was not the part about profanity, but rather that your language, not just your words, are important. I remember as a kid (and often as a college student!) being more upset or angry about a tense situation when I saw the person in charge was upset about it. When my leader stayed calm, and used helpful, positive phrases instead of negative ones, it made me stop and think about whether my anger was justified. It significantly helped diffuse small situations that could have easily escalated into larger arguments. -
The section that stuck out to me was, “Look for the positive in each campers and emphasize it in front of others. Help campers to be accepted by the group. Find the campers’ abilities and talents; then put the campers in a position to demonstrate those strengths to others.”
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\nI think it’s pretty rare for younger girls to emphasize the good in each other, or even reflect upon the good traits of their peers. Growing up, I know that my sisters sometimes didn’t even realize something about me- a talent or an interest- until my parents had brought it to light; having fun gets in the way, but if a role model makes an observation about a person’s positive trait, everyone – including that person – is proud.
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\nI think that a counselor’s job is to make sure that the group is making progress as a cohesive unit. By bringing a shyer girl’s special talent to light, a counselor can make that girl feel more confident and ultimately more respected by her peers. This seems like a great way to get everybody to learn from each other! -
The main section that stuck out to me was “Don’t shout or raise your voice.” I remember a babysitter that me and my sisters had when we were younger, who we called Loud Lauren. Everything that we did, we got yelled at for. It was horrible!! She sucked the fun out of everything that we did. Eventually we just ignored her and went on with playing.
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\nPeople in general like to have fun and I think that unless it is and emergency, or could result in an injury then let them have fun. Don’t scream and shout about everything. After awhile they will think that it is your regular tone of voice, or just stop caring. Then when the time comes that you raise your voice and need them to listen, they won’t. If you feel like you’re about to raise your voice or yell and it is not needed, maybe step back and take a deep breath. Then go on with the day! -
The one that stuck out to me was “Stay a few minutes after lights-out at bedtime to talk with your campers.” Last year we hugged each girl and tucked them in (juniors). It became such an important ritual not only to quiet them down but also to listen to their concerns. It helped fix so many little problems and prevented a lot that were developing. It also made each girl feel special and heard.
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“Don’t be afraid to admit that you have made a mistake or are wrong about something. It shows that you are human.”
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\nso true. as a counselor, you kind of have this intimidation thing going on before you break that ice. you’re older, outgoing, and fun– for those campers who aren’t immediately playful and in your face (and even for those who are), admitting mistakes or even telling an embarrassing story helps so much in creating a warm, friendly cabin atmosphere, and works to facilitate really meaningful relationships with your campers. i’ve definitely benefitted from abiding by this rule of thumb. -
“Have fun at the dinner table. Get everyone talking. Try playing word games.”
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\nI feel like this one stuck out to me the most because meals are always a good bonding moment for the cabin. Its the first thing that you do together as a cabin besides Cabin Day and free periods. Its a good time for everyone to get loose and have fun play games like the freeze game and get everyone laughing. Singing songs during meals is also good to because everyone gets loud and crazy and its a time to just let go. You also can find out what campers really want to do when they are at camp! Thats how I learned a lot about my cabin last year and I sat by someone different every meal so that I could get to know them a little better till the very end of camp! -
Wow! Everyone has shared fantastic advice. I had a hard time picking just ONE so I’m going to use the generality loophole. Positive energy is my favorite. It is the multi-tool you should n’er leave home without. (really you should carry it at home too. In fact, it’s rust free, so wear it in the shower.) One of my mom’s catch phrases is “accentuate the positive; eliminate the negative”. So when you make rounds at sweet dreams time, accentuate the positive; ask about the favorite event or joke or craft, activity, new friend…. When you emit positive energy, the people around you feel it. Positivity multiplies. Think about a person in your life who wears a smile without fail. It is great to be around that person. It is more difficult to be positive when you’re tired or energy begins to wane; store rest like a camel. Have a quote or mental image to remind you of how you’d like to be. This ‘job’ gives back. The more you pour into it, the greater the returns.
\n”Come into the mountains, dear friend
\nleave society and take no one with you
\nbut your true self
\nget close to nature
\nyour everyday games will be insignificant
\nnotice the clouds spontaneously forming patterns
\nand try to do that with your live”
\n(Come into the mountains, dear friend by Susan Polis Schutz) -
The advice about getting enough sleep is a little narrow in scope but very important to do. I personally do not run off of a lot of sleep, (six hours to me is like ten to the next person), but I found last year as a CIT that I would become exhausted by rest hour because I would run off of little sleep but both literally and metaphorically be running around camp. I think it is important to take advantage of the free periods you have and not bite off more than you can chew. Being well rested makes you more relaxed and enjoyable to be around for both campers and counselors!
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The suggestions that jumped out at me were 1. BEING CONSISTENT 2. NOT USING PROFANITY and 3. NOT SHOWING FAVORITISM
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\nI think campers really look up to their counselors. I can rememebr when I went away for my first time, the thing that scared me the most was being alone. I was afraid to go without my friends! My counselors were so nice and were always so positive so my goal is to set the same example. They were always really consistent and set a good example. I knew I could count on them for anything. I also think its important to treat everyone in the cabin the same, because younger kids can be more sensitive. -
Teach manners by saying “please” and “thank you.”
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\nEven though camp is a place to have fun and be goofy, manners can still make a pleasant and positive impact on a cabin. Sentences beginning or ending with “please” and “thank you” are generally less harsh and can quickly catch on with campers who might not follow simple manners at home. -
Stay a few minutes after lights-out at bedtime to talk with your campers. Lights-out and rest periods are two excellent opportunities to really get to know your campers.
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\nThis says a lot about camp to me. Some of my best memories came during this time. I remember when I was younger how our counselor would read us a story everynight after lights out. As I got older, we would just talk and laugh and have fun! It was great. Whether we were listening to stories or talking to one another, I was glad that I got to know my friends and counselors during this time. Yay camp!!! -
I spied with my little eye the phrase about having fun while eating. Well, at first my initial thought went directly to: When do we have these amazing food fights?!?! but after reading further, i guess that’s not exactly the point it was trying to get across.
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\nSo after I realized that this was not about having food fights at the dinner table, i spied another comment about finding something positive in every camper. I think that showing the strengths of every girl is very important at camp. No one wants to focus on weaknesses because we all know we have them (everyone…lol) but that is not what life is about. Soooo, i believe that it is extremely important that each camper is able to express them self in their own manner and it is very important for counselors to point out each of her camper’s strengths!! woot woot, i can’t wait!!!! -
The tip that I was most drawn to was, “Look for the positive in each campers and emphasize it in front of others.” I think that this is one of the most important things that we can do as the adult in our cabin family or camp community. This not only shows the campers that we are not only taking the time learn or hear about their strengths, but that we so impressed we are sharing our praise with others. I know that when I complement one of my students in class, they normally sit up taller while everyone else looks to see what that person was complemented for and to find out if it is something they can do as well.
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“Talk with your group leader or supervisor at any time, about any problems, campers or otherwise. You will not be able to handle all of the problems and challenges by yourself. Talking with a group leader or supervisor does not mean that you are not doing a good job. Becoming an effective counselor is a learning process.”
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\nThis means the most to me because the issue of poor communication between me and my parents is just now arising- after years of me stressing out about it! Long story. So you can imagine how wild my emotions are right now–but I am looking forward to Rockbrook as a major change in my life. I want to learn to communicate better and stop trying to handle everything on my own!! Being in college has made me realize that there are many things you just can’t do on your own. Creating a support system is key! -
“Young people can be experts in some areas. Genuinely recognizing and respecting this fact is one way to win over a camper.”
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\nThis especially stands out to me because I was “the baby” in my family with a 10 and 8 yr age difference between my older sisters and myself, as well as all of my many cousins being around the ages of my sisters. I always had difficulties at large family gatherings and in the everyday life at home with just my sisters of feeling like I was just the little kid they had to watch over and take care of. I remember wondering if I would ever get to the age where I would be looked at as one of them- older, cooler, and wiser. Luckily, my sisters did a pretty good job of recognizing some mature parts of myself and pointing out to me that in some ways I was even smarter than they or their friends were about certain things. It always gave me an extreme self-confidence booster as well as helping me to create a closer bond with them due to an increase in respect I felt coming from them. I was also able to view them as more of leaders who truly loved me and recognized me as a person instead of just authority figures who wanted someone to boss around. -
“Don’t be afraid to admit that you have made a mistake or are wrong about something. It shows that you are human.”
\nAlthough I totally agree with practically every helpful tip, this one really stood out to me, especially as a new counselor. I think that it is really important for people to do their job to their best ability, but like the article said, we are all human. In my experience, if I try to do something flawlessly, I end up making a bigger mess than I would have with a few simple mistakes. Don’t over-think it; just have fun and do your best! Because I am a new counselor, it will probably be my motto while I get to know everyone really well as well as the dynamic of Rockbrook. But most of all, I’m so excited! -
The suggestion that hit closest to home for me was the tidbit about anticipating what a camper is going to do next. Not only does this encourage counselors to observe and learn the ways of their campers as individuals, but it helps us to be prepared in multiple senses. We can be more effective leaders by mentally “staying on our toes” and at the same time develop a deeper connection to our campers. I’d call that a win-win situation
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Well just about everything on that list I found really helpful, but I especially liked the one that said “Don’t shout or raise your voice…” I think it’s so true that if you yell all the time, it just loses all effectiveness as a disciplinary technique. I know that in school, whenever I’d have a teacher that would freak out at the slightest disturbance, I would just learn to tune her out after a while, and just came to consider every little thing I did as wrong, rather than learning what is truly right and wrong in a classroom environment. The same goes for camp: if I were to get angry and yell at a camper for leaving her clothes all over the place AND for, say, hitting another girl, it makes the two seem like equal offenses, and she might not fully get the greater severity of one over the other. And anyway, if a camper comes to know me as a fairly calm and measured person, but then she does something that makes me get actually angry, I think that one instance would stick out to her way more than if I got angry at everything.
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I had a really hard time just choosing one. However I think this is one I’ve benefited from:
\nDon’t be afraid to admit that you have made a mistake or are wrong about something. It shows that you are human.
\nThe campers aren’t stupid and if you make a mistake chances are at least one of them will pick up on it. If you stick to whatever the mistake was and don’t change or apologize then you are setting a bad precedent for your campers. They will learn from you that they don’t have to admit their mistakes or change anything. If you admit you made a mistake and apologize or make amends for it, then your campers will have a positive example to follow. You could help them realize that they don’t have to appear to be perfect all the time. Everyone makes mistakes at some point in their lives. Treat it as a learning experience and handle it with grace and poise. -
These are all awesome responses. It’s inspiring to see the amount of knowledge and experience we have collectively. I can’t wait to work with you this summer!
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